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Awesome thread, lots of laughs...i'll add a few:Leaving Deer Creek night 1 summer before last, my friend starts yelling "Whose got tomorrow's miracle today!"
Leaving 10/29 or 10/30/10 show, cant remember which, we were talking with people on our walk back to our hotel along the boardwalk and we decided that our group and their group were going to get our best bike cabbie(which were all along the boardwalk, little blue canopies over a bike) and race them following the next night's show...wish it would of actually happened haha
A dude screaming the lyrics of crosseyed except he kept screaming "Lost my shit!"
Score: 1
At Superball this year sometime in the afternoon im chilln at my tent and all of a sudden some guy yells "Where the f*** am I??" The dude fell asleep in someone elses tent then started to panic when he woke up because he didnt know how to get out of the tent. I eventually was able to open the tent for him and he found his campsite. At essex after the show i see this dude on a bike with a balloon in one hand..after he inhales he looks at his friend and says "Whats a skrillex" before faceplanting
This isnt a line but at my first show at holmdel in the pav some guy next to me flickes a cig that is only half done..it lands in front of this guy who doesnt even look at who threw it but instead picks it up in stride and keeps walking
Ok one more..last night at superball i found this dudes phone and when i returned he gave me a few xanax as a reward which i took to a food vendor on shakedown..the dude at the vendor looked at his partner and asked "Do we take xanax as payment? and off i walked with a few slices
Score: 11
Last year at Great Woods I'm walking through the lot with my friends and hear the usual list of people calling out "Molly, L, Dank, etc, etc" when I hear "Dirty Pillows! One for three, two for five, get 'em while they're dirty, and I mean real dirty," I turn around and sure enough, guy's got some pillows he's obviously been sleeping on all tour
Score: 2
In the bathroom of MSG this year (12/30 I think) dude is throwing up pretty violently and his friend is just standing outside the stall talking to him. And then says, " you'll still give me your ticket for tomorrow night, right?"No pity for NYE
Score: 4
not phish but worth sharing...camped next to some dude at moe.down in like 2005 or 2006 and he was riding his unicycle around all weekend. was very good at it. one day hes strolling by, going slow enough so that his friends can walk casually next to him and he goes "if i can still ride my unicycle this isnt very good K" literally a half second after he finished that sentence he faceplants. it was amazing.
Score: 4
anything that includes a "watch this...." when leaving alpine (this huge dew filled hill by exit)also heard a great "watch this" at SBIX pre-tube opener. a large group had a sea of beach balls on the ground ready for flight. i was walking back to my group from the bathrooms and all i heard were those two words, saw somebody run and jump, and THUD! apparently, beach balls do not break your fall.
and basically any "wait...what?" response at a show. the looks are priceless.
Score: 0
Love the... "YEAHHHHHHHHH BOWIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" when in fact they are starting Maze. Makes me happy every time.
Score: 2
All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
Score: 5
At Blossom '11, a guy was trying to navigate through the lawn to find his friends while being very polite to everyone he was stepping over.He got to the group in front of me and said, "Careful, I don't want to step on your sunglasses on the ground."
The owner of the glasses said, "Then don't."
Everyone around started laughing and it still makes me laugh still to this day.
Score: 1
this is a story of someone overhearing us at bridgeview '10. My cousin and I were walking around the deep back reaches of the lot looking for food. Cousin was saying something like "who's selling grub?", and this sketchy dude and his friend said, "hey man over here", and and leads us behind his car. We ask well what do you have? and he says "Opiates" and starts listing all these pills . We just stared at him for a second then recognized the mistake and started laughing, we told him we asked about food, not drugs. he got all freaked out and embarrassed and we moseyed on our way.
Score: 4
Walking out of The Gorge 09:Random spun ion sidles up next to me and says" Man, i was at Dennys tonight and I told them they
better take my plate back and put ranch on that shit!" Now i am not really sure where the nearest Denny's is in relation to the venue, but can't be close.
Then back at our campsite at around 3AM, everyone winding down, one of the neighbors(who obviously took her drugs too late in the night) starts yelling at her crashing camp mates repeatedly "IS THAT US? WELL TURN THAT SHIT UP!" I believe it was Pondermonkey or some other indescernable EDM/Dubstep. When I woke at 7 she was still going full steam, hooping to the same crap. We did not see much of her the rest of the weekend though.
Score: 2
At Trey this past Saturday, the 3 guys behind us were incredibly quiet, but at one point one of them said in an almost silent whisper, "I ate too much, are you guys okay, I think I ate too much." Then silence the rest of the night- I don't think they moved during intermission either.
Score: 11
@chalk2001 said: All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.I think i vaguely remember this. I certainly walked that bridge multiple times everyday, particularly after each night... Were you doing it after the day set saturday? cuz thats when i remember hearing it.. and possibly partaking. lol
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
Score: 0
@WGphan92 said: @chalk2001 said:I definitely remember hearing that, especially after the day set.All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.I think i vaguely remember this. I certainly walked that bridge multiple times everyday, particularly after each night... Were you doing it after the day set saturday? cuz thats when i remember hearing it.. and possibly partaking. lol
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
Score: 1
"Has anyone seen molly?"
Score: 0
We decided to share a cab with some other phans going to the 12/27/10 Worcester show. The ride at first was pretty quiet, then the guy in the front street started asking the cab driver some random questions. "What is your favorite breakfast food?" "Where can we find crack around here?" My favorite- "what's your favorite Tom Hanks movie?" So random but a pretty funny way to start the evening. Too bad the evening didn't end as well ! NO cabs, ended up getting a ride with some random guy who tells us about two minutes into the car ride that he just got out of jail for armed robbery! Oh, Worcester.
Score: 5
@chalk2001 said: 
All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.YES!!!! I lost count how many times I heard that. All weekend off and on.
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
Score: 0
NYE this year I hit the bathroom just before show time and this heady bro next to me is talking to any one who will listen. He's going on and on about the previous nights show, the he says "Yea man, when the teased 2001, I was hoping they would play it but of course they didn't" So I say. "Um, they did play it"
He says " No bro that was a tease, do you know the difference?"
some other dude: "Do you asshole? They played 2001 last night, learn how to handle your shit"
I didn't say anything else the kid all of a sudden wasn't so chatty.
Side note: I laughed at your story @bajaphish. I can picture the guys all geeking out but not wanting to say anything to one another. Funny stuff
Score: 2
Like most folks, I've heard many odd units for sale on lot but the one that really rang my bell was, " I got your Viagra" at Coventry, it was afterall the height of the pill popping culture and who doesn't love a good boner commercial?
Score: 0
@chalk2001 said:
All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.i remember hearing it a lot at Raleigh last year and chimed in a bit
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
Score: 0
@boogieman said: "dude..they're playing tweezer again!"If this quote was from The Gorge this past summer ('11) and you were in the pit, this very well could have been me, as after the Sand jam ended and Tweezer picked back up I had a funktastic meltdown that went something along the lines of, "AHHHHH#!%@&!^!&*! THEYRE PLAYING TWEEZER AGAIN!!! YEAAAAAHHHHH!!! WOOOOOOO!!!" One of my finer moments, I'd say.
Score: 1
@jezmund92 said: @chalk2001 said:I was pretty spun at Mansfield, and this started up...All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.i remember hearing it a lot at Raleigh last year and chimed in a bit
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
I looked around, took a big breath to scream it as loud as I could, and some guy next to me shaking his head went "oh jesus, dont listen to em man, youre better than that"...
...and then I screamed it anyway. Im such a rebel.
Score: 1
@conradjohansen said: @WGphan92 said:Ha, yep that was me. It's just that micro-second connection you get with the responder. It's so special.@chalk2001 said:I definitely remember hearing that, especially after the day set.All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time. Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!I think i vaguely remember this. I certainly walked that bridge multiple times everyday, particularly after each night... Were you doing it after the day set saturday? cuz thats when i remember hearing it.. and possibly partaking. lol
Ha.
@conradjohansen sorry I missed you at SBIX dude. Saw your brother while he was elbowing through to pit during the day set. It was one of those "hey....I know you...do you know me?" moments.
Score: 0
there was a douchebag named Lyle who camped near us at SuperBall... made it a point to ride the rail for every set. he was the biggest elitist asshole east-coast phishy kid i've ever met, and would deride anyone around him at any point of the weekend for disagreeing with him or knowing slightly less about the band and their music.after Day 2 Set 3, we're all chillin back at the site and he starts claiming that he was the one responsible for 'conducting' when each band member came in with the WHOOO!s after the peak of the Twist jam. he absolutely refused to believe anything otherwise, and went on to say,
"when the song started, the dude next to me on the rail said 'what's Twist?'... what's Twist?? WHAT'S TWIST???" all indignant, and 100% serious. my gf and i still say it whenever the song is mentioned. hilarious dude.
Score: 0
On the boat back from Camden 7/30/03 when someone asked what was the name of the encore song someone replied "Secret Smile". The guy goes "Who sings that?" An annoyed fan says "Phish".
Score: 0
I just thought of another moment after that "WOOO" post...Real late after the storage jam at sb IX, me and my girlfriend were walking back to our tent area in Alaska. Things were pretty quite, you could hear the chatter, bursts of laughter, tanks, all that great stuff at a festival. We finally got back and just relaxed, absorbing in all the feelings. Then someone randomly screamed "WOOOOO!!" That started tons of them.
"WOOO!!"
"WHAAAAAAAT!?"
I definitely partook in the festivities. It was great. Then, all of the sudden some realllllly spun out wook who was standing pretty close to us let out this wretched "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" But, it was awful. You know those moments where you scream something and your voice cracks and sounds like 10 vultures attacking their dying prey... Kinda like that.
Everyone stopped. There were a couple of laughs, but mostly silence. We kinda just think he popped a blood vessel in his neck and passed out. There were no more Woo's or What's in our section in Alaska after that happened.
Score: 1
Redrocks 2009 my buddy got spun for the first time and my other spun friend was the "sober driver" for that night. We pull out of the parking lot and made it to the freeway and the first timer was in the front seat talking all fast and gibberish-like in a psychotic pirate tone and says to the car "do you know whats going to happen if we get pulled over by the cops right now"? car - "what?" "Im hitting the pavement at 90 miles per hour butt ass naked haaaaa haaaa haaa"
At hornings hideout string cheese 2010 i see this guy compliment this tree huggers hat and he says "Thanks bro i got it from ingesting egregious amounts of ketamine and smoking copious amounts of deemsters while dancing to the beat of the mantra.....followed by crazy dubstep tree thugger robot sound effects and trippy hand spirals.
The dead LA forum 2009
Im at the top middle under the score board and i hear screaming from the back row, i turn around and see a crazy woman in the middle of the aisle repeatedly screaming "I know what you did bobbbbbay!!!! and i did what i did and said what i said, i did what i did and said what i said god dammit, i still have the scars from 85 god dammit" and various other psycho babble. No idea what the f*** that means but i saw the same lady in 2010 at the furthur LA greek shows at the back of the venue screaming almost the same exact words.
2009 gorge my friends and i got a meatstick chant going amongst us and some guy turns to me and says "DUDE!!!! Shut the f*** up bros i hate that song....."
At hornings hideout string cheese 2010 i see this guy compliment this tree huggers hat and he says "Thanks bro i got it from ingesting egregious amounts of ketamine and smoking copious amounts of deemsters while dancing to the beat of the mantra.....followed by crazy dubstep tree thugger robot sound effects and trippy hand spirals.
The dead LA forum 2009
Im at the top middle under the score board and i hear screaming from the back row, i turn around and see a crazy woman in the middle of the aisle repeatedly screaming "I know what you did bobbbbbay!!!! and i did what i did and said what i said, i did what i did and said what i said god dammit, i still have the scars from 85 god dammit" and various other psycho babble. No idea what the f*** that means but i saw the same lady in 2010 at the furthur LA greek shows at the back of the venue screaming almost the same exact words.
2009 gorge my friends and i got a meatstick chant going amongst us and some guy turns to me and says "DUDE!!!! Shut the f*** up bros i hate that song....."
Score: 1
not the greatest but first day of bethel last year we parked in the first parking lot that you had to pay to get into. Well as alot of you know the line out of there that night took forever and there's these two dudes in a car in line who sang STILL WAITING, STILL Waiting, the whole time we were stuck in traffic.
Score: 0
the same night at redrocks when my buddy got spun for the first time.....we were walking out of the show and it was both our first phish show, as were walking out i buy a veggie burrito from this dreadder and my buddy trys to knock it out of my hand and yellsssss "dudeeee what the f*** are you thinking i bet you can taste the WHOLE DAY in that burrito"
Score: 2
After 12/30/2011, I was trying to cross the street at the corner of 8th and 33rd and I throw up mid step in the street, someone yelled "Ohhhhhhh, I think he had too much", and get pulled back to the sidewalk by my friend where I puke again, so we decide sit down. I then ask him if I am going to die. I did in fact, have too much too fast.
Score: 1
At SBIX, when "Life on Mars?" came on: "What's this? It's David Bowie. Dude, this is definitely not David Bowie. No dude, it' not David Bowie, it's David Bowie. Are you serious? There's no way this is David Bowie. Dude! I'm trying to tell you..." This went on for a few minutes. I got a good kick out of it.
Score: 7
Festival 8 - the neighbors kids came over to give us candy on halloween ( we had just given the parents doses ) probably 8 year old boy goes "im not really an astronaut, im just dressed like one for halloween" made me realize i wasn't actually on the moon.
Score: 4
Not Phish, but at a TAB show this fall it some guy was having a conversation with one of the security people. At some point the guy says "do you even know who Trey is?!?" and the security guy says something to him and starts walking away. The guy yells after him "STOP ACTING LIKE A ROBOT, COME BACK HERE AND ACT LIKE A HUMAN BEING!"
Later leaving that show, some guy starts saying to everyone around him "Sorry for partying too hard man...... Not sorry!". He kept repeating this, and one of the times he says the first part really seriously, and follows it with "You thought I was sorry, I'm not sorry!!!" like he thought he had just said the funniest thing ever, making it that much funnier. I thought it was pretty hilarious, I still use that line sometimes.
Later leaving that show, some guy starts saying to everyone around him "Sorry for partying too hard man...... Not sorry!". He kept repeating this, and one of the times he says the first part really seriously, and follows it with "You thought I was sorry, I'm not sorry!!!" like he thought he had just said the funniest thing ever, making it that much funnier. I thought it was pretty hilarious, I still use that line sometimes.
Score: 0
This was actually at the Dead at Red Rocks in '03, but it's my best story. I walk up to this dude in the lot and ask if he has a lighter. Upon seeing his face, I immediately realize he's tripping balls (I'm close myself). He proceeds to hand me his wallet. I open it and realize it is, in fact, his real wallet with cards, license, etc. I hand it back, and tell him "hey man, this is your wallet!" He drops it on the ground and walks off. To this day, I'm convinced he looked into his wallet, saw his life and was disgusted in his state of mind, and tried to leave it behind. Ha.
Score: 0
some of my favorites...7/26/99-
"what the f***?! even gordo sucked tonight. i can handle trey sucking..."
alpine '04-
"i think i have a rock in my shoe. huh, it's a chicken finger..."
cincy '09
douche: "that dude sold me some kick ass opium."
quasi douche: "for the fourth time, that guy sold you f***ing bowl resin!!"
Score: 0
In bathroom pre-show blossom 12Crowd starts cheering - but its still too early for them to go on stage! - sample starts up and I hear
"congrats everyone, you are already pissing when sample started"
lol
Score: 7
At SBIX during the storage jam, there was this dude standing next to the big ball that was there. He was convinced that Phish was inside of it and kept knocking on the ball and saying, "I know you're in there". Pretty hilarious.
Also, enjoyed the guy at MPP yelling "ice cold nitrous! got your ice cold nitrous!"
Also, enjoyed the guy at MPP yelling "ice cold nitrous! got your ice cold nitrous!"
Score: 0
Dicks 3 2011.
me at set break: "wow that was possibly the best show, I have ever seen."
my buddy, "you mean set?"
me, "no that's the f***ing show, they played right through set break. Shows over. f***ing Amazing."
my buddy, "what the f*** are you talking about, there is still a second set!"
I soon snapped out of my chemically skewed thinking, "f*** your right, that was only set one!"
me at set break: "wow that was possibly the best show, I have ever seen."
my buddy, "you mean set?"
me, "no that's the f***ing show, they played right through set break. Shows over. f***ing Amazing."
my buddy, "what the f*** are you talking about, there is still a second set!"
I soon snapped out of my chemically skewed thinking, "f*** your right, that was only set one!"
Score: 0
"Is that Burt Reynolds?"
"Only a buck, what the fuk"
"Is this the Mariah Carrey concert?"
"Only a buck, what the fuk"
"Is this the Mariah Carrey concert?"
Score: 2
@conradjohansen said: @WGphan92 said:@chalk2001 said:I definitely remember hearing that, especially after the day set.All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.I think i vaguely remember this. I certainly walked that bridge multiple times everyday, particularly after each night... Were you doing it after the day set saturday? cuz thats when i remember hearing it.. and possibly partaking. lol
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
Lol sign'd, i totally remember the butt scratchtasss.
Score: 0
"Ice cold water!""wouldn't that make it ice?"
"....really cold water!"
Score: 2
After set 1 on NYE '11-
Dumb n00b girls: "Encore! We want an encore!"
Walking out of Deer Creek '12-
Guy behind me: "Dude that second set was the rug to my Big Lebowski apartment"
I lol'd at both of these
Dumb n00b girls: "Encore! We want an encore!"
Walking out of Deer Creek '12-
Guy behind me: "Dude that second set was the rug to my Big Lebowski apartment"
I lol'd at both of these
Score: 0
Once at a Dead show, a mobile vendor was scooting by (sitting on a cooler on a skateboard) and was holding cigarettes upside down and yelling "ICE COOOOOLD UPSIDE-DOWN VEGGIE CIGARETTES!"
Score: 0
ill never forget during festi 8
with a hilarious case of "no more voice"
walking around yelling at the top of my lungs
"who's got my dmt churros?"
finally a guy stops and hes like.. "oh you want some deemsters?"
and my buddy goes.. "yea but we want them in churro form..."
dudes like "all i got is pills."
so we said "no thanks"... he looked super confused..
later as we are walking through campgrounds yelling out the same thing.. someone from in their tent goes.. "that sounds DELISH"
with a hilarious case of "no more voice"
walking around yelling at the top of my lungs
"who's got my dmt churros?"
finally a guy stops and hes like.. "oh you want some deemsters?"
and my buddy goes.. "yea but we want them in churro form..."
dudes like "all i got is pills."
so we said "no thanks"... he looked super confused..
later as we are walking through campgrounds yelling out the same thing.. someone from in their tent goes.. "that sounds DELISH"
Score: 0
9.23.00 - As Stash was beginning, some sorority chick behind my brother and I remarked, "...this is like, the song we get to clap on! I remember it from that Live thingy CD. Glad I listened to it before we came!" I proceeded to die/laugh/vomit-verp a little on the inside upon hearing these comments... and also by now recalling them.
Score: 1
Was at my phirst show in tahoe in 2011. Before the show we told some older phans that it was our first show and they were so shocked. They literally took us and introduced us to the entire crowd around us like "hey its their FIRST SHOW! Can you believe it?" anyways through the rest of the show this one guy asked us what we thought of it like every 5 minutes followed by saying "Stick around man stick around, it's gonna get crazy!" Not sure if he actually thought we would leave mid show but we thought it was hilarious. We still say it to each other all the time at phish shows.Sitting in the VIP section at Bonnaroo '12 for the second set because my buddy said he was tripping a little too hard to be in the crowd. Everyone in VIP is sitting in lawn chairs with rain coats and umbrellas not dancing or singing or expressedly having fun of any kind. Shirtless dude sprints from the back wearing a giant cookie monster head and starts humping the fence uncontrollably. My friend gets super excited and runs up to him and gives him a huge hug. Somehow the cookie monster head engulfs my friends head so it looked like they were basically making out. Woman next to me turns to her husband and says something like "Oh my god can you believe this? Do you see a security guard anywhere?"
I was crying laughing.
On NYE this wook next to me hands me a joint. I shrug and say "Why not" as I take it. He goes, "Yeah why not! It's not going to make the music sound worse or anything!"
Score: 0
@chalk2001 said: All the "mm-buttscratcha?" (from Family Guy) calls while filing in and out of the stage area at SBIX. If anyone remembers crossing that covered footbridge over the track knows what I'm talking about. Thing was a chokepoint and I'm pretty sure I initiated it 80% of the time.agreed.
Stupid, I know but I found it hilarious!
[youtube][/youtube]
Score: 0
First show was 8/9/98 (lucky first show for sure). They started playing YEM...friend turns to me and goes "Do you think they will play number 6 next, too?" he was referring to chalkdust from A Live One...
sure enough, they played it, but after a Frankenstein in between.
sure enough, they played it, but after a Frankenstein in between.
Score: 1
side note:
does anyone remember at Hershey Park in 2010 after the show the group of spunsters when we had to cross that street....a huuuuge group of people was following the crowd and like 50 people were led into a pretty thick bit of bushes? Instead of walking around, everyone just ducked and pushed and scrapped their way through--to get to the sidewalk.
and also
"who's got my bath salts" was everywhere this summer
and lastly, this guy spun as shit this summer at Charlotte was leaning against his car while I was leaning against my friend's fan waiting for the whole crew to surface. He is just babbling to me about god knows what and asks if he can have some of my water. I say sure, go head, take the whole thing I've got a bunch, and then continue to lean against van. all of the sudden I hear him talking to his friend about me: "can you see it? can you see her? she's so old, in the future this will be so old. this is the best painting i've ever seen. it's vintage"
Score: 0
i forget what show..."it must be a doctor's kid. anatomically correct and all..."
edit: i had to call my 1.0 tour buddy to get that quote just right. he can't remember the show either...
Score: 0
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