I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.

Waiter: Would you like to hear today's specials?
Patrick Bateman: Not if you want to keep your spleen.

Do you like Phil Collins?

I have to return some videotapes.

Craig McDermott: If they have a great personality and they're not great looking... then who f***ing cares?
Patrick Bateman: Well, let's just say hypotetically ok? What if they have a great personality?
[pause, all laugh]
Patrick Bateman: I know, I know.
[all in unison]
Patrick Bateman, Craig McDermott, David Van Patten: There are no girls with good personalities.

well done sir!

@careful_w_that_axe_Miller said:

@rhinotropicmicrogaze said:

+100 if you name this movie.

"I want a job, I want a job, I want a good job, I want a job that pays. I want a job, I want a job, I want a real job, one that satisfies.......... my artistic needs"

Sid and nancy

"This is America. If you don't make money, you're a f***ing douche-bag."

and the opening monologue for No Country For Old Men.

Nigel Tufnel from This Is Spinal Tap:

There's something about this that's so black, it's like how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. None more black.

You can't really dust for vomit.

Marty DiBergi: It's pretty.

Nigel Tufnel: Yeah, I like it. I've been fooling around with it for a few months now. Very delicate.

Marty DiBergi: It's a bit of a departure from what you normally play.

Nigel Tufnel: Yeah, well, it's part of a trilogy, a musical trilogy that I'm doing in D... minor, which I always find is really the saddest of all keys, really, I don't know why. It makes people weep instantly to play [plays and sings]

Nigel Tufnel: It's a horn part.

Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty. Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like — I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of...

Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?

Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump."

"Oh, Mr. Environmentalist is also a hunter... kind of an interesting combination"

"I hunt quail Jeremy- they are overpopulated in this region and they are decimating the grubworm population. You have a f@#$ing problem with that?"

"Not nearly as much as the attire you have on or your general point of view towards everyone, but hey lets go kill some birds, I'm psyched."

@GreenSparrow said:

"That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."

uh...^^

@MomaDan said:

I don't do drugs just weed.

Is that the only Half baked quote? Crazy. For better or worse, lines from that movie have entered my immediate social group's lexicon... Eh, probably for the worse. But they make a certain kind of poetry when taken out of context and out of order:

"What was that thing we used to eat back in the day?"

"I'm somebody's b*tch!"

"You ever suck some d*ck for marijuana?"

"You ever see the back of a twenty dollar bill... on weed? Oh, there's some crazy sh*t, man. There's a dude in the bushes. Has he got a gun? I dunno! RED TEAM GO, RED TEAM GO!"

"I be from Jamaica, mon. Lord have mercy.
What part of Jamaica?
Right near da beach. Boy-eeee!"

"B*tch! You know what I want!"

"He had sex with my momma! Why?"

"Trust me, bro. I've made bongs with less."

"Yo, that sh*t must be good, B. My boy hasn't coughed like that since back in the day yo!"

So there I am, in Sri Lanka, formerly Ceylon, at about 3 o'clock in the morning, looking for one thousand brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. So, Jeff Beck pops his head 'round the door, and mentions there's a little sweets shop on the edge of town. So - we go. And - it's closed. So there's me, and Keith Moon, and David Crosby, breaking into that little sweets shop, eh. Well, instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big Bengal tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shopowner and his son... that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty business, really. But, sure enough, I got the M&Ms, and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show.

Those sir, are IOUs...

My girl friend sucked 36 dicks!
At the same time?

@BrolgiApparatus said:

@Frizz said:

My girl friend sucked 36 dicks!
At the same time?

37! My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks!
In a row?

Sorry, had to

Thank you. I fuked that up bad.

Seems like I need to watch it again.

"Either we take our chances with the ghosts.or become ghosts ourselves":::Robin Hood-Prince of Thieves((()))

PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN!

A
B
C

@careful_w_that_axe_Miller said:

@phisher131 said:

"... Those aren't pillows!"

Haha ha how bout when they are driving down the road the wrong way and Steve Martin look over and John Candy is the devil ha ha spoofed on family guy ha 1/2 kids that watch family guy probably had no clue where that came from. Classic +10 ha ha

What do you think the temperature is? One.

"Kevin get upstairs!"
"We are upstairs ya dummy."
:door creaks open ominously:
"The third floor! I can't sleep up there! Fuller sleeps up there! And he wets the bed!"

Best.Christmas.Movie.Ever