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Took my last 1/8 of suboxone around 36 hrs ago, pretty grumpy but otherwise upbeat. I've withdrawaled like 10 times this year, problem was I had a doctor who wrote me a script every month, then I'd binge on the meds, buy more meds, come off with suboxone just to start again each time the doctor wrote the script. I moved away from it for a while. Still got like 225 blue footballs and they definately help through the process, they are most likely next to go though I'd like to use them to help with nicotine.
Nicotine is harder to quit than opiates, straight up.
I'm gonna get really really high smoking bud and go destroy my legs in the gym which will produce the best buzz buzz of which I am aware.
::I'm pretty stoned right now but last night I passed out to the harpua > Reba> harpua w/ mr claypoole last night so this is all relevant. If that is what I heard, anyway
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That's what I like to here, Best of luck to ya Mr. Miller. Make us proud.
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Good for you brother. Gym is a great idea. Any steam bath/saunas in the area? Not for the gay sex but for the actual benefits of the steam... pour out sweat and toxins, out with the old in with the new. I swear by it. The gay sex part is an added benefit.
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::eats a sock, crawls under bed::Very proud you MrMiller.
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Gym, steam room, eat healthy, appreciate your real feelings.
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good luck...you know this site will give you support, but addiction support is also available though most state/county agencies if your persistent. If you have insurance, hit up a rehab if possible to get you on track...
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Be strong. Just remember that every second of pain in withdrawal will be all for not if you go back to it. That's the thought that helped me kick my monkey(s). You can do it!
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Get after it @careful_w_that_axe_Miller. You don't need opiates to go a camera brother!
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stick to it, eventually your going to feel better than ever
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It might suck but you should quit footballs and cigs same time. Use skoal bandits or something like that to break the smoking habit and not have total nicotine withdrawels but only use those for about 2 weeks, just when your craving the most, like 1-2 times a day. then switch to f*** loads of hard candy and gum. It works. I smoked for 18 years and Im coming up on my 3 years of quiting. sure here and there I have smoked at a party or when Ive goten real drunk. But I dont smoke more than a whole pack a year. When my Dd died was the hardest time, actually bought a couple packs. But its easier than you think you just have to want to. Find a girl or friends who dont smoke and hang with them. About the opiates, my friend tried same method. You really just got to go all the way and quit all pills, or its easy to slip. Good luck!
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Good luck brah. I was an oxycotin addict for 10 years. I'm getting close to 3 years clean now. I've never been happier.
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im not trying to be a smart ass but you said "Still got like 225 blue footballs and they definately help through the process..." arent these "footballs" opiates as well?
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@Rutherford_B_Raves said: im not trying to be a smart ass but you said "Still got like 225 blue footballs and they definately help through the process..." arent these "footballs" opiates as well?No, they're Xanax and they are benzos. They have a more dangerous withdrawal (only substance other than alcohol which the withdrawal can kill you). I know that I don't need to tell you to be careful and have a healthy respect for those little blue footballs MrMiller.
My friend recently kicked the opiates so there is good karma in the air for you. Good luck my fellow phan.
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Good luck, man. Reach out when you need to. If not here, somewhere.
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@PricklyHairs said: @Rutherford_B_Raves said:O I C. i was pretty sure they were Xanax i was just confused as to the drug classification.im not trying to be a smart ass but you said "Still got like 225 blue footballs and they definately help through the process..." arent these "footballs" opiates as well?No, they're Xanax and they are benzos. They have a more dangerous withdrawal (only substance other than alcohol which the withdrawal can kill you). I know that I don't need to tell you to be careful and have a healthy respect for those little blue footballs MrMiller.
My friend recently kicked the opiates so there is good karma in the air for you. Good luck my fellow phan.
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You got this my friend! I'm always here for you man. Show those opiates whose the boss. (I think its Tony Danza, but you're a close second)
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Great job but man, and I'm sure you already know, but after you take a couple benzos a day for a month or two you won't be able to sleep without taking one, and you will be hooked. Now, if you are prescribed them there's not much to say about it because the doctors said it was a good decision.
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Benzos, they are worse IMO. And it'll be tough to cut cord but I've dropped from 3+ bars a day to 2 mgs max even through withdrawl, normally 1.5 mg. My goal is to trip face with as few other chemicals in my body as possible sonetime in late spring.
Thank you all for kind words.
Edit: oh ya, I saw a chick drop in the dr's office and have a seizure coming off high dependancy on benzos, not to be f***ed with; greeting card commercials can make you cry.
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been 2 weeks for me. finally got past the first milestone! if i can i know you can too! 
U KAN DOO EET
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Now that you are in SoCal and a MMJ card holder(I thought I read in another thread?) look into Rick Simpson Oil to help kick your habits. Should be readily available in dispensaries down there. Do your research though and find the quality R.S.O not the make a dollar on sick people R.S.O, ya dig?It will help you I promise.
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I dont know half of what your talking about - I do one one thing.Just stop killing yourself.
Maybe drink some water and try to live life not high.
I really think in the end you have to value your gift of life and not destroy your body everday.
This coming from a guy who has 2 drinks mostly everyday, and bong hits.
But seriously - I think if you can realize you are killing yourself - which you already know...just take it a hour at a time. I wish you good luck.
I do not think your goal should be to trip face in late spring.
How about a goal like living until tomorrow without getting high.
Good luck
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@YorkvilleBeerLover said: I dont know half of what your talking about - I do one one thing.Good advice but did you say this with a beer and a bong sitting next to you on the desk!?
Just stop killing yourself.
Maybe drink some water and try to live life not high.
I really think in the end you have to value your gift of life and not destroy your body everday.
This coming from a guy who has 2 drinks mostly everyday, and bong hits.
But seriously - I think if you can realize you are killing yourself - which you already know...just take it a hour at a time. I wish you good luck.
I do not think your goal should be to trip face in late spring.
How about a goal like living until tomorrow without getting high.
Good luck
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no - but running home to mother's helper now!
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good luck. you can do it.
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Well done and good luck.
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@YorkvilleBeerLover said: I dont know half of what your talking about - I do one one thing.Bit heavy on the killing yourself thing huh? Whoever is a slave to the traffic light are already dead,at least I'm living, very appreciative of that fact. I'm cool with just Ning hits and the gym, that's what the goal is; but I'm hemmed up. It's not like a switch you can turn off, it's compulsion; that's why I moved 2500 miles away. Though I'm 25 miles from a drug capital ha ha ha
Just stop killing yourself.
Maybe drink some water and try to live life not high.
I really think in the end you have to value your gift of life and not destroy your body everday.
This coming from a guy who has 2 drinks mostly everyday, and bong hits.
But seriously - I think if you can realize you are killing yourself - which you already know...just take it a hour at a time. I wish you good luck.
I do not think your goal should be to trip face in late spring.
How about a goal like living until tomorrow without getting high.
Good luck
Thankful for each day bro, thanks for sentiments all
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keep it up bro,just went thru nightmare getting my friend into rehab & she sounds SO GOOD now,
she is full of inspiration & living a new life
brave for sharing
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@MrMillerAhhhhI dont know you but I know your handle and I'm pretty sure we've laughed at a few of eachtothers jokes over the last year or so.
Quitting opiates is one of the hardest things you will ever do. People will tell you that you should put your faith in God, that you should put your faith in prescribed alternatives or any other manner of placebo. The best advice I can give you is be a stubborn son of a bitch. Every time you are tempted, and there will be many, look inwards at who you were when you were 10 years old. Ask yourself what would 10 year old MrMillerAhhhh think of it.
You'll be fine. Good luck brother and i'm always available to talk.
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substitution is good for addictionsubstitute good habit for a bad habit, this goes for each of us
put a regular practice together, a routine
the GYM is crucial (plus if you can get the sauna in winter is nice)
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@joonze said:
good luck...you know this site will give you support, but addiction support is also available though most state/county agencies if your persistent. If you have insurance, hit up a rehab if possible to get you on track...This is good advice from @joonze. Good luck. We all have things that get us through the night, but some of them can be real demons of darkness.
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@Potato_Sacks, @lefty, (always interested in new ways to find gay sex partners, steam helped), @Euclid, @Wookiephart, @KimboSlice, @joonze, @johnnyd, @Bulletproof, @The_Mollusk, @DownWithDaSeas, @flatbottomfrank, @easywind111, @Rutherford__B_Raves, @popsgordon123, @mgh2001, (doctors, power to heal and make ill), @BOATSnHOSE, (good luck bro), @retired_from_dotnet, (RSO thank you), @YorkvilleBeerLover, @ddderek, @phishhheads, (what's the extra h for?), @Drgordy, @GhettoSloth, (good luck to your friend & f*** ya bro I sat in sauna and can't believe how good it felt), @TheEmperorJoker, (10 yr old me ha ha ha good stuff), @talkinghead, (without darkness there'd be no light, good luck to you man) In all seriousness, thank you all for the support, kind words and what not.
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You seem like a smart guy but be vigilant with your addictions, seriously. I wish you well, man.
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Good luck man. I've seen opiate addiction go majorly awry (you know what I mean), and its just not worth it. Do it for your family. Do it for yourself. Do it because summer tour is closer than you think!!
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Stoked your realization is coming on loud and clear- YOU got this, hope to hang someday- relatively sober
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Also think of the money you can save for shows!
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Best of luck man you do seem like a very smart individual and opiate addiction is something I have never delt with personally buts its affected my life and I have seen people get clean I thought never could. All i can do is wish you luck Miller
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Heres a story to help you quit. So buddy was heavy into oc`s for awhile. Apparently he got super constipated for a couple weeks. He goes to take a shit one day, and the turd just kinda poked its head out. Never fully shit. So he goes to the bar that night, ends up bringing a girl home. The chick kept trying to stick her finger in his asshole...after the third or fourth try on her part he just gets up and leaves the girl in his room, goes to a buddies house. Never touched ocs again. True story
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My ex is withdrawing from both and used both heavily. She expected the dope to be the tough part but after 2 weeks found out benzo withdrawals are way harder. Sounds like your slowly lowering your doses of the benzos which in my opinion the way to go, but keep truckin til your completely off them!
When I quit benzos it was very very hard but trust me life gets good again. I will take them rarely when I feel like my heads going to explode, but taking them daily never crosses my mind. Like you, I was aware I had a problem when I was hooked on them and you can't quit unless you have that mindset. You're doing it right, but remember that all that shit is deadly and it's something not to f*** around with.
One last thing, marijuana helps a lot with withdrawing. It helped me withdraw big time. I smoked daily and heavily for 7 straight years and thought I'd never quit. But again don't become dependent on it, its a drug(defend it all you want, but it makes you lazy and stupid). I realized 3 weeks ago smoking nuggs was even destructive. I now havnt smoked and 3 weeks and lifes still good if not better and i don't miss it.
Good luck with your recovery!
When I quit benzos it was very very hard but trust me life gets good again. I will take them rarely when I feel like my heads going to explode, but taking them daily never crosses my mind. Like you, I was aware I had a problem when I was hooked on them and you can't quit unless you have that mindset. You're doing it right, but remember that all that shit is deadly and it's something not to f*** around with.
One last thing, marijuana helps a lot with withdrawing. It helped me withdraw big time. I smoked daily and heavily for 7 straight years and thought I'd never quit. But again don't become dependent on it, its a drug(defend it all you want, but it makes you lazy and stupid). I realized 3 weeks ago smoking nuggs was even destructive. I now havnt smoked and 3 weeks and lifes still good if not better and i don't miss it.
Good luck with your recovery!
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((vibes)) sent. Be strong!
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Good luck - I know we are at odds at times because of your eccentric ways but when it comes to addiction, no one deserves anything less than judgement free support. hope you get well.
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Good job brotha,be strong YOU can beat this! I've been there and know how hard it can be. One day at a time is the best way IMO
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Oy, as I read these posts I feel utter guilt. @careful_w_that_axe_Miller, I hope that you are successful in kicking a bad habit. I have heard others say to stop the benzos and cigarettes at the same time -- here's my advice: Don't. You know how bad opiate withdrawls are, and they last a while. Maybe you should kick that, and smoke your cigs when you need to. My reason for guilt: I had my orthopedic doctor appointment yesterday, and he discovered that I have a disc in my back that is slipping. I am going to require surgery to fix it so I do NOT have to live a life with back pain and a course of non-stop intense opiate medicine regimen, which is good. However, because of the agony I get from this back pain currently, he put me on some pretty serious stuff. I've had issues with opiates in the past, but was lucky to not take it that far as to become addicted where I crave it when I don't have any.
It's a terrible thing what doctors do -- they try to help, but end up making the patient dependent on some terrible drugs.
I wish you the best.
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How's day 2 goin?
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I hope all in well in the land of Miller. Keep on keepin on brother and remember to take care of yourself during this time man!
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Paging miller land... how goes it?
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@AugustWest2001, @dave25 said:
Paging miller land... how goes it?I'm on western time ha ha today is really day 3, I've been thru this a couple times and would not proclaim success until it is achieved. It is achieved, now and for the foreseeable future I'm clean of opiates. Thanks all, I'll read later
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@RovingReporter said: Oy, as I read these posts I feel utter guilt. @careful_w_that_axe_Miller, I hope that you are successful in kicking a bad habit. I have heard others say to stop the benzos and cigarettes at the same time -- here's my advice: Don't. You know how bad opiate withdrawls are, and they last a while. Maybe you should kick that, and smoke your cigs when you need to.If you need them it's different. I can't honestly look myself in the mirror and say "I need pills"; now 40 years from now, f*** it.
My reason for guilt: I had my orthopedic doctor appointment yesterday, and he discovered that I have a disc in my back that is slipping. I am going to require surgery to fix it so I do NOT have to live a life with back pain and a course of non-stop intense opiate medicine regimen, which is good. However, because of the agony I get from this back pain currently, he put me on some pretty serious stuff. I've had issues with opiates in the past, but was lucky to not take it that far as to become addicted where I crave it when I don't have any.
It's a terrible thing what doctors do -- they try to help, but end up making the patient dependent on some terrible drugs.
I wish you the best.
Good Luck to you man