It's Friday!?

I'm brewing the phuq out of 144bbl of pale ale. No time for teh ghoti.

Banannas and Blow!

@OG_Pinecones said:

Oh yea knew that would PEEK your interest! Sicko's! LOL! Love the .net crew. Could go for a wawa gobbler right about now....so yummy! Hope everyone's doing well and enjoying some phish on this Friday eve.

Dude snag some of the double dutch chocolate milk they sell... sweet jesus that might be the best chocomilk I've ever laid my tongue upon

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, chocolate milk

@Phlat_Brim_Kid said:

Lets Talk more about WaWa! im from western Ny and we dont have them. i recently took a trip to Va and was able to stop at several wawa's! Absolutly the most bad ass gas station i have ever seen! My boys girlfreind and myself would'nt allow the car to stop at anything but a wawa while we were down thayer! so bad ass! i love wawa!

The sausage egg and cheese bagel sizzli is the way to go. It's the only fast food breakfast I eat anymore.

Chances are that if you're in the land of WaWa, you're also in the land of Turkey Hill Peach Iced Tea. It's like liquid crack I think. Turkey Hill ice cream ain't bad either...

@TheEmperorJoker said:

Let's talk more about hookers. They're already dead on the inside...just sayin

I dunno, we've got a lot of tranny hookers 'round here, and I get the impression that they are what they aspired to be for some reason.

tell me your thoughts and opinions on Facebook. Feel free to include descriptive personal stories and anecdotes that further support your main ideas.

@the_Crested_Hogchoker said:

@TheEmperorJoker said:

Let's talk more about hookers. They're already dead on the inside...just sayin

I dunno, we've got a lot of tranny hookers 'round here, and I get the impression that they are what they aspired to be for some reason.

and u learned this how?
/NTTAWWT
/actually thayer is something wrong with that

I'm not going to say I wouldn't jam a tranny, but she'd have to be a high class f***in' masterpiece. I mean not even a trace of an adam's apple, and a girlier voice than like 80% of real women.

I also wouldn't pay to ram a tranny, if I'm throwing cash around, I'm going to defile an actual babymaker.

This instantly reminds me of hearing the song, "Hooker and Coke" by an awesome band called the Frank Stalloners at the Equifunk Festival back in '11.. I have expressed my love for this festival before , but this band is now a regular act at Equifunk and they are SO MUCH FUN!! They played late night sets both at the Bethel Weekend and again in '12.. Really cool guys with lots of talent and this song is like their anthem at Equifunk...

I am in love with that story

@TheEmperorJoker said:

And there's no dead hookers in my trunk...any more.

I can still hear her scream tho...

was she pretty?

@Phlat_Brim_Kid said:

@the_Crested_Hogchoker said:

She also can't be rocking a whig. I've got to be able to throw her around by her hair.

I just Laff'd alot!
U alway crack me up man!

/fan'd

Right back atcha!

or blow, or WAWA!

@SpreadheadJON said:

or blow, or WAWA!

DId i ever tell u guess about the time me and this hooker did a bunch of blow at a wawa?

@SpreadheadJON said:

more hooker storys!

You ask, I deliver. Long story completely 100% true.

"My second hooker" by Mr Miller

I should say that these stories come from my youth; I am not proud of these actions and they seem to be those of a different person as i sit here.

Basically I spent my early 20's smoking lots of dope, listening to music and playing axis and allies with my friends at this dudes' house we had all known for 10+ years named Jim. Now Jim went about 350 on a light day and do to a minor stroke as a kid he was a bit different but very intelligent. In the old days he would buy us liquor so we'd hang out. Loneliness can be difficult. Loneliness from human touch is impossible. I was still travelling 50 weeks a year and at that time the only casinos near me in Pittsburgh were AC or Niagra Falls, this is also before there was a casino on the American side. Just the casino next to the Hilton. In some manner I was told about hookers in Canada and we all went to Canada a few times a year as it was only about 3hrs, so Jim and I decide to head north specifically to find prostitutes. I booked a nice room facing the falls at the Hilton, and upon arrival Jim and I opened the phone book to escorts and dialed a date. We were pretty nervous ha ha even though he and I were both demented and weighed a combined 580. We ordered two bottles of wine from room service at like $90 a bottle and reserved the escorts for 2 hours just to be safe. I'm smoking joints like a house fire, being nervous was fun.

Knock knock knock, I'm not ashamed to say that after requesting an escort I have not answered the door when they arrived on several occasions. This time I opened the door, two women stand before me and I can't help thinking briefly that I could easily score "these types" of chicks at the bar, a blonde bout 25 and a Venezuelan chick about my age now. I was 21. It was pretty awkward, and I realize now that those types of escorts were t expecting to chill and drink some wine. I'm not sure how we figured out who was to who but I ended up with the Venezuelan chick, she smelled awesome spoke little English but was warm and I am mean kind sicko's. The blonde was all about business, ha ha she asked the Venezuelen chick if she wanted to trade due to age ha ha ha. So we had a little wine.

Most prostitutes you cannot kiss, that is what I truly miss about female companionship is making out, this woman allowed me to kiss her and so it began. We had two double beds in a hotel room, I'm on the right and Jim on the left. I am having fun, Venzuelan chick is having fun but from the other bed I hear, "this never happens", I continued with what I was doing and did not stop for 60-90 minutes but I continued to overhear things like, "I don't understand" "what's wrong with it?" "Why won't it work" ha ha my buddy Jim was having an issue, the two of them on the bed to the left must have gone through that for an hour until finally I hear, "oh ha there it goes" and 10 seconds later the blonde girl was headed to the bathroom in order to shower. Jim sat watching Niagra falls as this Venezuelen chick taught me a few things about sex and introduced me to new orphouses.

When they left there were condoms on the bed and wine glasses everywhere, I call concierge and ask for new sheets. When they got to the room there were two men, one in the shower and one in his underwear watching the falls, condoms all over, dirtied sheets, and the smell of sex. Ha ha I'm quite sure they thought we were homosexuals.

[X] Delivery
[ ] DiGiorno.

@careful_w_that_axe_Miller said:

I made a mistake, that chick in WV was not my first hooker and the chick in Canada not my second. My first and second hookers were at 18 in the Frankfurt, Getmany Red Light district.

All tolled I've used the services of 8 prostitutes thus far ha ha, I'm creepy ha ha ha ha ha

::awaits new .net mod of mass destruction::
::find love and fight like a motherfucker to make it stay::

Dude, you may have just put this thread into "best of .net" status.

I

@MrMillerAhhhh

cocaine and champagne

the higher the floor the cheaper the whore,-classic @careful_w_that_axe_Miller Excellent story my friend. I approve. Now tell me more! I wish I had some sweet hooker stories. I feel quite inadequate. A few of my boys here in Philly hit the wishy washies for a little scrub and tug with the ladies of the night, but I seem to get left out on those missions. Maybe one day. For now, I must live vicariously through you.

Hookers and blow don't mix for me, I'd rather buy more blow than something to place my special purpose into especially if no making out. Not to mention your penis shrinks after you get over a teen. May not be appropriate to post blow stories, idk. I'm certainly not proud of my actions but they are my actions. Idk I do have lots of hooker and blow stories, I am a creepy dude. f***. No man is an island? I say nay:

"This dudes got genital herpes, my 7th hooker" by MrMiller

Ann Arbor, MI circa 2008. I used to use Gold Bond, but i am allergic to something in it and get a rash when I use Goldbond, have to use baby powder or Freshballs. I was traveling for work to Ann Arbor Michigan which is a pretty cool place if you've never been, very artsy with lots of community; a friend of mine traveled with me on this mission and he is btw the only dude to ever accompany me on a business trip. I live in the foothills of the Appalachians in the Ohio River Valley elevation 1250, but we are country folks. My buddy was amazed by the semis pulling 2 or 3 trailers as we made the 3 hr drive across lonely Ohio. As soon as we got to our hotel at ann arbor we got a cab and headed downtown to a bar 6pm and proceeded to get wrecked, closing the bar. 12:30am Their is a diner off main st in Ann Arbor that's open all night and a pretty hip place, we went to go eat; somewhere along the way I got to talking to an older black man 1:00am I inquired if he could help me out with a bit of hard. He looked at me like I was poison, but after I spoke to him a bit longer he began to lead me and my buddy around Ann Arbor, first to his place where his college cutie waited at the top of the steps and then next about 5 blocks across the railroad tracks and we scored. 1:30am
It was of excellent quality. We stayed at a Hampton Inn and blazed for a while. Well if you've ever binged on speed with frequency you may have become an expert at figuring out when there are only about 10 servings left, I was drunk and pretty f***ed up when we got to 10 the best way I know to come down from speed is zannies and sex 2:30am So I opened a phone book, requested blonde; she'll be there in 45 min, perfect.
I went to the front desk and got a different room 2:45am and left my buddy to push and burn his fingers, right on time 3:15am she is there, a bit aged but pretty hot with nice body holding a cellular debit card reader, $200 for a naked massage. Well the naked massage means that I was naked and she touched me like 3 times, she did find time to see my shrunken special purpose and asked,"were you doin coke tonight" ha ha but they massage you naked to check you out, see if you are diseased. Ha ha I had a rash from gold bond, she tells me $1500 to f*** her. I told her to go, $200 blue balls @3:45am 100% true story

::uh most recently tested for VD in 2011 and I was clean, ha ha::

Now this is what I call a thread!